Who are the list-making, planner and organizer types out there? Raise your hands! LOUD AND PROUD, list-makers! You are my people.
Dig if you will the picture of a list-loving person like myself who has everything planned and organized months in advance, each morning facing the blank screen of a yet-to-be-written blog post with no clue about what to say. True confession: I am doing these posts in real time. I don’t plan them a week in advance; I tried doing that in January, and it didn’t work because there wasn’t enough urgency or creativity or curiosity driving them. (Or perhaps better said, panicked desperation! Ha).
This project is an organic journey. Not only do I have no idea what I’m going to write about when I wake up in the morning, I have no idea what the theme will be for the upcoming month until about two weeks before it starts. Sometimes I have an idea a couple of months in advance, but as I get closer to the launch, I realize it’s wrong. That sucks, you guys. I hate having my plans upended. For example, I didn’t know I was going to change my name to ☀️💛 until I saw Tami Foster make an innocent comment on a social media post suggesting it. It hit me over the head like a big two-by-four from the sky. DUH. Of course I need to change my name, and of course, April should be the month! Panic ensued. But March’s theme of color had led me to paint in my Open Art Studio class, which then led me to paint my symbol.
I guess you could say I’m going kicking and screaming into The Flow.
This entire process is incredibly uncomfortable. I am a planner. I live for the high that I get from checking items off lists. (If I do a task that by some oversight I have not written on my list, I will add that item to my list to give myself the satisfaction of checking it off. I need help, clearly).
If I had to gamble I would say Prince was not an enthusiastic list-maker. Nor do I think my new identity, ☀️💛 would be a list-maker. So I’m learning to relax into it and enjoy the energy that comes from discovering the next step in real time. I trust. And I grow in faith.